I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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