Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
