If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
