.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
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