How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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