Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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