Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
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