hotel room ftw
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
