So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
can u get pink eye on your cock?
it's like iHOP with fire
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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