Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
