drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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