We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
