Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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