So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
