I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize