At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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