i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
he was CRYING into my vagina
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize