How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Randomize
