i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
