ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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