one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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