made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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