Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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