Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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