We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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