I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Randomize
