You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
