WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
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