I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
