I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
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