Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(614): View more from Ohio

her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny

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(208): View more from Idaho

How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?

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(919): View more from North Carolina

Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.

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(586): View more from Michigan

hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink

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(207): View more from Maine

We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Yeah, that was you

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(835): View more from Pennsylvania

You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.

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(970): View more from Colorado

Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....

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