I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
