Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
