i just google imaged poop.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Randomize
