she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
