Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Randomize
