After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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