shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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