I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I understand Curling. That high.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
