just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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