I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
What's dad's email?
[email protected]
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
