PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Randomize
