Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
