I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
The power of my boobs compel you
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
