how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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