There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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