We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
