hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
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