just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize