East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
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